Advice #2

This question came to me anonymously from a female that reads my blog. I’m not well versed in female “stuff”, but I’m going to answer it anyway.

Dear Jason,
I’m head over heels for my boyfriend, in every way…except one. He’s kind, non-judgemental, great personality, great body. But he has a small dick.
Can I make this work with a small penis? Is sex that important? Or should I concentrate on the everything else that is important outside of the bedroom?

Does Size Matter?

This is a great question. A little risqué, but good.
First of all, congrats on meeting a (near) perfect man! I guess the old standard “it’s not the size of the boat, it’s the motion of the ocean” applies here, but I don’t think that is what you are wanting to hear.

I think sex is important to any relationship. When one or both partners aren’t having a good release of sexual tension, it spills out into other aspects of the relationship…sniping at each other, secret “self help” sessions, etc. But can you make it work with a small penis? That’s up to you, but let pose some counter questions to think about while you decide. Even though the penis is small, does it get the job done? Does it last a longer/shorter amount of time than a penis of bigger size? Are you relying solely on his penis to satisfy you?

As with any relationship, I can imagine the actual penetration part of sex is kind of like second act of a three act play. The first act gets you involved in what’s going on and sets the mood for what’s to come. The second act is where the action happens. But the third act is where everything gets resolved and things wrap up.

There are lots of things that can solve your problem, I think. Oral sex is great, toys, different positions, role playing, teasing, attention to other areas (besides your vagina) that also enjoy the stimulation, or dirty talk.

It’s not always about the actual penetration. Sure, that part is great, but it’s not the whole show, so to speak. If that particular part is what actually gets you off, then I recommend an honest conversation with your man. Neither of you have the ability to make his penis bigger, but there are things that can be done, providing both of you want to make it work. Perhaps using toys to get you to the edge before him finishing the job, or there are sheaths that go over the penis to make the member longer and thicker while still providing stimulus for the penis.

Perhaps concentrating on the other aspects of sex would help. Some people like their nipples stimulated, or light biting, or spanking, or any number of other things to help get you there. It depends on your tastes.

As far as everything outside the bedroom, concentrate on that too, but don’t let feelings of inadequacy in the bedroom spill outside of it. That’s a recipe for disaster.

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